Yes, I performed my daughter’s wedding ceremony.  As an ordained minister, it was an honor to perform the sacred and sacramental rite of marriage for my daughter and it was the beginning of a close bond built between my new son and myself. The modern world has new thoughts about who should perform a wedding ceremony.  Couples want these special vows to be administered by someone they know and love—by someone who knows and love them.

Officiating my daughter’s wedding was legally performed.  I had studied at seminary to obtain my ordination, and I meet all the requirements in the state in which the ceremony was performed.  But now you can get ordained on line to perform that special wedding ceremony for a loved one.  It wasn’t my seminary studies that prepared me to perform this special ceremony.  It was raising my daughter that prepared me—knowing her, remembering her from the day of her birth, watching her grow, sharing joys and sorrows throughout her life and realizing the love she had in her heart for her new husband.  These were the things that prepared me.  As the officiate, I was able to help my daughter and her husband create a ceremony that embraced what they felt in their hearts, their unique spirituality and inclusion of family members on both sides. 

If you have been asked to perform a wedding ceremony for a loved one, then you have been honored.  However, it is important to make sure that you do so legally.  Following is a list of suggestions to follow regarding getting ordained on line to perform a wedding:

1.  Do you homework.  Make sure you find out the laws of the state in which you are going to perform the wedding.  Each state’s laws vary.  Don’t rely on interpretations of the law as provided by on line sites. 

2.  Call the Secretary of State’s office to find out the statute. 

3.  Armed with information regarding the statute, call the county to find out what their requirements are.  If the clerk tries to give you information that does not meet the statute explanation, explain to them your understanding of the statute and your right to religious freedom.  They will probably cooperate.

4.  Pick an online site that provides a phone number and call it.  Give them a couple of days to get back to you.  If they don’t return your call, don’t use them.

5.  Make sure your site is incorporated so that they can legally provide services.

6.  Make sure you order a paper copy of your ordination and that it carries an original signature and seal from the organization.  Do not rely on email messages that say your are ordained. 

7.  Keep your ordination certificate in a safe place.  You may need to verify your status as an ordained minister if the marriage is ever challenged.

Remember, the ceremony is an act of love and ministry to the couple.  Enjoy the honor but remember your purpose is one of facilitating the love between the happy couple.

Ordination begins with you.  It is a clear and concise decision, made by you, to accept your role in the divine plan for serving the children of God.  It is your decision to fulfill the main purpose of your presence here on earth.  It is your acceptance that you are not only worthy of serving, but that it is your inheritance.

The definition given for the word “Ordination” on dictionary.com is:  to invest with ministerial or sacerdotal functions.”  Our creator invests this purpose in each of us.  No one is really set apart as being more of a minister than another.   It is simply our awakening to our true function and purpose that sets us apart.  All are called and it is just a matter of time before all will answer God’s calling.  Once the call is answered, then one is a minister, regardless of religious affiliation or course of study.

Some cannot hear their calling.  We need not judge them.  We have all been blind to one thing or another during our lifetime   As the beautiful song “Amazing Grace” teaches, “I once was lost, but now am found, was blind, but now I see.”  Sometimes, the blind cannot see that they are blind.  We are no different.

Some of our blindness is the result of right, wrong thinking.  We believe we have the only answer—the right way, and that all others are wrong.  This right, wrong thinking drives our work, our thoughts, our direction.  We must convince others to change their wrong thinking.  Yet, right, wrong thinking drives us away from the one basic tenant found in all the great religions—love.  We are told to love our neighbors as ourselves.  I believe that much of this black and white thinking stems from a lack of love.

Some of us believe we have God figured out.  Yet, how could we have such a mysterious and glorious God figured out?  And, when we think we have the one right answer, doesn’t that limit our ability to hear other equally mysterious and powerful callings from God and his divine intercessions in ways we as yet cannot comprehend due to our own blindness?  Doesn’t it limit our ability to grow in God?

How do we begin the answer to our calling?  We begin by turning to God and asking for the intercession of grace.  Grace comes to all who ask for it.   It cannot fail us.  Through the grace of God, we go forward with our calling, not concerned for its direction, as long as we take each step with God.   

 “Ask and you shall receive,” is a powerful, powerful message.  Yet it is often misunderstood.  What are we to ask for?  If we ask for specific things, then aren’t we assuming that we know what we need more than God does?

 “Ask and you shall receive,” is also a simple message.  Our God wants us to have all that we need.  Yet, the greatest commandment given is based upon one word—Love.

What if our daily prayer went something like this:

Dear God, 
I ask knowing that I will surely receive.  Yet, I ask for only one thing—that I have the faith and trust in you to allow you to lead me, guide me and provide for me the things required to serve your people.  I know that I need not really ask, as you are an all-knowing, all-loving, all-powerful and all-giving God.  I know that I need only align my heart with yours, my love with yours, my direction with yours and wait with faith and patience for your guidance, through your most gracious and holy gift of grace.  Amen, and again I say, Amen.

According to the prayer of St. Francis, “it is in giving that we receive.”  If all that we ask for is for the common good of all of God’s children, an act of giving, then we shall surely receive.  If what we are asking for is founded in love, then, we shall surely receive.  If all that we ask for is to serve God’s people, then we will surely receive all that we would ever need. 

In closing, I refer to  the Sermon on the Mount in which we were told:

“Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink;  nor about your body, what you will put on.  Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?  Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns;  yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not of more value than they?  Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?  So why do you worry about clothing?  Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow:  they neither toil nor spin;  and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.  Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?  Therefore do not worry, saying “What shall we eat?” Or What shall we drink?” or “What shall we wear?”  For after all these things the Gentiles seek.  For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.  But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things.  Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”